(L-constrained wave equation)

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The Small Print

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Action figures sold separately. All models over 18 years of age. All rights reserved. An equal opportunity employer. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental. Apply only to affected area. Approved for veterans. As seen on TV. At included. Be sure each item is properly endorsed. Beware of dog. Booths for two or more.Breaking seal constitutes acceptance of agreement. Call toll free number before digging. Caveat emptor. Check here if tax deductible. Close cover before striking. Colors may fade. Contains a substantial amount of  non-tobacco ingredients. Contents may settle during shipment. Contestants have been briefed on some questions before the show. Copyright © 1995 Joker's Wild. Cape does not impart ability to fly. Disclaimer from improper installation, broken antenna or marred cabinet, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered serial numbers, sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, customer adjustments that are not covered in the joke list, and incidents owing to airplane crash, ship sinking, motor vehicle accidents, leaky roof, broken glass, falling rocks, mud slides, forest fire, flying projectiles, or dropping the item. Do not bend, fold, mutilate, or spindle. Do listings. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. Do not write below this line. Documents are provided "as is" without any warranties expressed or implied. Manager has limited access to safe. Don't quote me on anything. Don't quote me on that. Driver does not carry cash. Drop in any mailbox, return postage guaranteed. Inedible, do not eat. Edited for television. Employees and their families are not eligible. Falling rock. First pull up, then pull down. Flames redirected to /dev/null. For a limited time only. For external use only. For off-road use only. For office use only. For recreational use only. Do not disturb. Freshest if eaten before date on carton. Hand wash only, tumble dry on low heat. This footwear will not perform its intended function if worn in wet conditions. If a rash, redness, irritation, or swelling develops, discontinue use. If condition persists, consult your physician. If defects are discovered, do not attempt to fix them yourself, but return to an authorized service center. If ingested, do not induce vomiting, if symptoms persist, consult a doctor. No refill. Keep away from open flames and avoid inhaling fumes. Keep away from sunlight, pets, and small children. Keep cool; process promptly. Limit one-per-family please. Limited time offer, call now to ensure prompt delivery. List at least two alternate dates. List each check separately by bank number. List was current at time of printing. Lost ticket pays maximum rate. May be too intense for some viewers. Must be 18 to enter. No Canadian coins. No alcohol, dogs or horses. No anchovies unless otherwise specified. No animals were harmed in the production of these documents. No money down. No other warranty expressed or implied. No passes accepted for this engagement. No postage necessary if mailed in the United States, please allow 4-8 weeks for delivery. No preservatives added. No purchase necessary. No salt, MSG, artificial color or flavor added. No shoes, no shirt, no service, no kidding. No solicitors. No substitutions allowed. No transfers issued until the bus comes to a complete stop. No user-serviceable parts inside. Not affiliated with the American Red Cross. Not liable for damages due to use or misuse. Not recommended for children. Please use this sleeve to protect your investment. Not responsible for direct, indirect, incidental or consequential damages resulting from any defect, error or failure to perform. Not the Beatles. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. One size fits all. Many suitcases look alike. Other copyright laws for specific entries apply wherever noted. Other restrictions may apply. Package sold by weight, not volume. Parental advisory - explicit lyrics. Penalty for private use. Place stamp here. Please remain seated until the ride has come to a complete stop. Possible penalties for early withdrawal. Post office will not deliver without postage. Postage will be paid by addressee. Prerecorded for this time zone. Price does not include taxes. Processed at location stamped in code at top of carton. Quantities are limited while supplies last. Read at your own risk. Record additional transactions on back of previous stub. Replace with same type. Reproduction strictly prohibited. Restaurant package, not for resale. Return to sender, no forwarding order on file, unable to forward. Ribbed for your pleasure. Safety goggles may be required during use. Sanitized for your protection. Sealed for your protection, do not use if the safety seal is broken. See label for sequence. Shading within a garment may occur. Sign here without admitting guilt. Simulated picture. Slightly enlarged to show detail. Slightly higher west of the Rockies. Slippery when wet. Smoking these may be hazardous to your health. Some assembly required. Some equipment shown is optional. Some of the trademarks mentioned in this product appear for identification purposes only. Subject to FCC approval. Subject to change without notice. Substantial penalty for early withdrawal. Text may contain material some readers may find objectionable, parental guidance is advised. Text used in these documents is made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles. The best safeguard, second only to abstinence, is the use of a good laugh. These documents do not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either myself, my company, my friends, or my rabbit.This disclaimer was stolen from Phillip Winn (pwinn@winn.com), who can't remember from whom he stole it. This is not an offer to sell securities. This offer is void where prohibited, taxed, or otherwise restricted. This product is meant for educational purposes only. Times approximate. Use only as directed. Use only in a well-ventilated areas. User assumes full liabilities. Void where prohibited. We have sent the forms which seem right for you. You must be present to win. You need not be present to win. Your canceled check is your receipt. Your mileage may vary. To upgrade please press [Enter]. Never use damaged footwear. Not valid unless digned. If found, please return to your nearest branch. Operation is subject to the condition that this device does not cause harmful interference. Feel free to call. Free gift not for sale. Take with food. Welcoming all who respect these values. Don't just sit there, go somewhere. There is enough iron in this package to seriously harm a child. All claims and returned goods MUST be accompanied by this bill.

 ...okay -- UNCLE already!


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